Friday, November 25, 2005

The Shotgun Won (Oops, I ruined the ending!)

Ever wonder what gun would be most handy when you lost the key or forgot the combination? This guy answers the age old question: Which gun is best for blasting a lock open.

Thursday, November 24, 2005

England Daniel, Coffee and Sobaheg

Yeah, it's been a while.
Not much.
How 'bout you?

Anyone else remember England Dan and John Ford Coley? Fast fact: England Dan's last name is Seals. Dan Seals. His brother, Jim Seals, was one half of Seals and Croft, of "Summer Breeze" fame. "Summer breeze, makes me feel fine, blowing throught the jasmine in my mind." Ahh, who cares!

I'm just stopping in with a thought about my boy Daniel. Daniel likes to hand out compliments. To his mom, he says things like, "Mom, I love you. You're so beautiful. You look so pretty when you wear dresses." Well, today, Daniel said to me, "Dad, you're really big. You could stomp on somebody." And I'm like, (in my best Arkansas Josh accent), "Dern straight, boy. You best not forget it neither!"

Wanna know the secret to my "Winter Blend" coffee? I know it's not winter yet, but there's some snow on the ground, and it's cold, hence IT'S WINTER. So, we've been using a percolator thingy to make coffee, and it makes the best coffee ever. Pay attention, Brother John. This will make you love coffee. I put the coffee grounds in just like you ordinarily would. Then a half a spoon or so of Hazelnut coffee (not too much, we ain't making Hazelnut coffee!). Then, right on the grounds, sprinkle some Cinnamon, some Pumpkin Spice, and some Nutmeg. Again, not alot, just some. Percolate that and enjoy the smell. Pour your cup, smell it some more. Mmm... then add your sugar, cream, whatever you like to do. Oooh, so good. In the words of Robert Johnson, "The stuff I got'll bust your brains out, baby, wooo hooo!"

In other news: Had a bout with a stomach thingy the other day. Knocked me down for about 24 hours. But when I recovered, my pectoral injury was HEALED. So, back to the pushups, I only have a month left to get in the tippy topiest shape I've ever been in. No more 465 pushups a day though, I don't want to hurt myself again.

Ok, raise your hand... who's having Sobaheg today?

Tuesday, November 15, 2005

Saturday, November 12, 2005

Now I went and did it...

Tonight I had to stop at 165 pushups because I injured myself! My left... well, everything related to my chest and arm hurt, like I pulled my pec. Can you pull a pec? I don't even know.

In other news: I was cold today. So cold that I put on long johns this morning. As I was putting them on, I thought, "It's a shame. John is a fine name. And yet it is used as a nickname for many things that just aren't worthy of the name: Underwear, toilets, people who employ prostitutes. What's up with that?" I like the name John. I like some guys name John. But I was cold today, and what was I supposed to do.

Let's Go, Covies.

Covenanters, here's a chance to show your good side! :)

A Covenanter challenge: Let us know what makes you a True Covenanter.

"You who call yourselves Covenanters, how do you endeavor to keep the Covenants? What are you doing to meet the ends of the Covenants? What makes you a true Covenanter, personally? ecclesiastically?"

I've been thinking about this for a number of days now, and it has been challenging and convicting to me, as I see how many ways I fail to meet up to my profession. I plan on posting a response when I have some decent time to sit and organize my thoughts on the matter.

If you feel so inclined to challenge yourself, and the rest of us as well, head on over to the Covenanted Reformation Club and add your two cents on how you, today, endeavor to keep the National Covenant and the Solemen League and Covenant.

"And let us consider one another to provoke unto love and to good works" (Heb. 10:24).

Friday, November 11, 2005

This week in review

I sure don't seem to have the time I used to. Between work, family life, and working out, I just don't have the time to write stuff much anymore. Maybe in a way that's good. My "Christianity," as I practiced it for a couple years, helped me to grow out of shape and wise in my own eyes. Now, after some difficult but necessary life lessons, I'm less apt to think I got something you people need to hear, and I stopped just sitting around pigging out. I'm much less quiet, but way more active, now. Anyway, this week is interesting to me for a few reasons.

First, Tuesday was election day. In Dover, PA., a somewhat local town (York County), the folks decided that "Intelligent Design," a watered down compromise stopping far too short of Biblical Creationism, was intolerable and ought not to be suggested to our children. Every school counsel member that was up for re-election that supported Intelligent Design was voted out, in favor of people who promised to offer only Ignorant Design (evolution) to the children in the Dover School District. Pat Robertson offers this in response: "If there is a disaster in your area, don't turn to God. You just rejected him from your city, and don't wonder why he hasn't helped you when problems begin."

And, just to clarify what he meant, Robertson explained, "I was simply stating that our spiritual actions have consequences and it's high time we started recognizing it. God is tolerant and loving, but we can't keep sticking our finger in his eye forever. If they have future problems in Dover, I recommend they call on Charles Darwin ... maybe he can help them."

Let's just quit kidding around. Schools need to adopt a statement like the following before I will beging taking them seriously:

"... as God, from the infinity of his being and goodness, has communicated a finite created existence to all other beings, framing them with natures wisely suited and adapted to the different ends of their creation; so by the same all-powerful word whereby they were at first created, he preserves and upholds all his creatures in their beings, and by the incessant care and invariable conduct of his divine providence, does constantly direct and overrule them, and all their actions unto his own glory; according to divine revelation; Gen. 1, throughout; Col. 1:16; Rom. 11:36; Psal. 145:17, and 33:9; and 119:91; Heb. 1:2,3; Confess. chap. 4,5; larger Cat. quest. 11; short Cat. quest. 8." -- Act, Declaration, and Testimony for the Whole of Our Covenanted Reformation.

Second, yesterday, November 10th, was Martin Luther's birthday. May God send another man like this to thunder and to shake the world to Reformation.

Third, yesterday, November 10th, was the 30 year anniversary of the sinking of the Edmund Fitzgerald. The 729-foot long 13,632 ton freighter was caught in an awful storm, and it, along with 29 men, sank in Lake Superior. It is my understanding that not one body was ever recovered.

"'Superior,' they said,
'never gives up her dead
when the gales of November come early.'"
~Gordon Lightfoot.

Tuesday, November 08, 2005


I feel really anxious, kinda scared, like I want to cry....

And I'm not sure why.

Monday, November 07, 2005

10% girl?

You Are 90% Boyish and 10% Girlish

You have a tough exterior - and usually a tough interior to match it.
You're no nonsense, logical, and very assertive.
Sometimes you can't understand women at all, even if you're a woman yourself.
You see things rationally, and don't like to let your emotions get the best of you.

Yeah, ok... 10% girlish, what because I don't curse like a sailor? That's BU*~&#$@!
I'm working on 465 pushups TONIGHT. (did over 1100 total last week).

Saturday, November 05, 2005

A Letter of Samuel Rutherford on Being a Christian in Tough Times

DEARLY BELOVED IN THE LORD, AND PARTAKERS OF THE HEAVENLY CALLING.- Grace, mercy, and peace be to you, from God our Father and from our Lord Jesus Christ.

I always, but most of all now in my bonds (most sweet bonds for Christ my Lord) rejoice to hear of your faith and love; and that persecutions and dockings of sinners have not chased away the Wooer from the house. I persuade you in the Lord that the men of God, now scattered and driven from you, put you upon the right scent and pursuit of Christ; and my salvation on it (if ten heavens were mine) if this way, this way that I now suffer for, this way that the world nicknameth and reproacheth, and no other way, be not the King's gate to heaven. And I shall never see God's face (and, alas, I were a beguiled wretch if it were so!) if this be not the only saving way to heaven. Oh that you would take a prisoner for Christ's word for it (nay, I know you have the greatest King's word for it), that it shall not be your wisdom to speer out another Christ, or another way of worshipping Him, than is now savingly revealed to you. Therefore, though I never saw your faces, let me be pardoned to write to you, if possibly I could, by any weak experience, confirm and strengthen you in this good way, everywhere spoken against. I can with the greatest assurance (to the honor of our highest, and greatest, and dearest Lord, let it be spoken!) assert (though I be but a child in Christ, and scarce able to walk but by a hold, and the meanest, and less than the least of saints), that we do not come nigh, by twenty degrees, to the due love and estimation of that fairest among the sons of men. Therefore, faint not in your sufferings and hazards for Him. Where can we find a match to Christ, or an equal, or a better than He, among created things? Oh this world is out of all conceit, and all love, with our Well-beloved. Oh that I could sell my laughter, joy, ease, and all for Him, and be content with a straw bed, and bread by weight, and water by measure, in the camp of our weeping Christ! I know that His sackcloth and ashes are better than the fool's laughter, which is like the crackling of thorns under a pot. But, alas! we do not harden our faces against the cold north storms which blow upon Christ's fair face. We love well summer-religion, and to be that which sin has made us, even as thin-skinned as if we were made of white paper; and would fain be carried to heaven in a close-covered chariot, wishing from our hearts that Christ would give us surety, and His handwrite, and His seal, or nothing but a fair summer until we be landed in at heaven's gates! How many of us have been here deceived, and have fainted in the day of trial! Amongst you there are some of this stamp. I shall be sorry if my acquaintance A.T. has left you: I will not believe that he dare to stay away from Christ's side. I desire that ye show him this from me; for I loved him once in Christ, neither can I change my mind suddenly of him. But the truth is, that many of you, and too many also of your neighbor Church of Scotland, have been like a tenant that sitteth mail-free and knoweth not his holding whill his rights be questioned. And now I am persuaded, that it will be asked at every one of us, on what terms we brook Christ; for we have sitten long mail-free. Many take but half a grip of Christ, and the wind bloweth them and Christ asunder. Indeed, when the mast is broken and blown into the sea, it is an art then to swim upon Christ to dry land. It is even possible that the children of God, in a hard trial, lay themselves down as hidden in the lee-side of a bush whill Christ their Master be taken, as Peter did; and lurk there, whill the storm be over-past. All of us know the way to a whole skin; and the singlest heart that is has a by-purse that will contain the denial of Christ, and a fearful backsliding. Oh, how rare a thing it is to be loyal and honest to Christ, when He has a controversy with the shields of the earth! I wish all of you would consider, that this trial is from Christ; it is come upon you unbought. Do not now joule, or bow, or yield to your adversaries in a hair-breadth. Christ and His truth will not divide; and His truth has not latitude and breadth, that ye may take some of it and leave other some of it. It is not possible to twist and compound a matter betwixt Christ and Antichrist; and, therefore, ye must either be for Christ, or ye must be against Him. I know and am persuaded that Christ shall again be high and great in this poor, withered and sun-burnt Kirk of Scotland; and that the sparks of our fire shall fly over the sea and round about to warm you and other sister churches; and that this tabernacle of David's house, that is fallen, even the Son of David's waste places, shall be built again. And I know the prison, crosses, persecutions and trials of the two slain witnesses that are now dead and buried (Rev. 11.9) and of the faithful professors, have a back-door and back-entry of escape; and that death and hell and the world and the tortures shall all cleave and split in twain, and give us free passage and liberty to go through toll-free: and we shall bring all God's good metal out of the furnace again, and leave behind us but our dross and scum. We may then beforehand proclaim Christ to be victorious. He is crowned King of Mount Zion: God did put the crown upon His head (Ps. 2.6; 21.3) and who dare take it off again? Two special things ye are to mind: First, try and make sure your profession; that ye carry not empty lamps. Alas! security, security is the bane and wrack of the most part of the world. Oh how many professors go with a golden lustre, and are gold-like before men (who are but witnesses to our white skin) and yet are but bastard and base metal! False under water, not seen, is dangerous, and that is a leak and rift in the bottom of an enlightened conscience; often failing and sinning against light. Woe is me that the holy profession of Christ is made a stage garment by many, to bring home a vain fame, and Christ is made to serve men's ends. Know, secondly, except men martyr and slay the body of sin in sanctified self-denial, they shall never be Christ's martyrs and faithful witnesses. Oh if I could be master of that house-idol myself, my own mind, my own will, wit, credit, and ease, how blessed were I! Oh, but we have need to be redeemed from ourselves, rather than from the devil and the world! O wretched idol, myself! when shall I see thee wholly decourted, and Christ wholly put in thy room? Oh, if Christ, Christ had the full place and room of myself, that all my aims, purposes, thoughts, and desires would coast and land upon Christ, and not upon myself! And howbeit we cannot attain to this denial of me and mine, that we can say, 'I am not myself, myself is not myself, mine own is no longer mine own', yet our aiming at this in all we do shall be accepted: for alas! I think I shall die but minting and aiming to be a Christian. Is it not our comfort, that Christ, the Mediator of the New Covenant, is come betwixt us and God in the business, so that green and young heirs, the like of sinners, have now a Tutor that is God! And now, God be thanked, our salvation is bottomed on Christ. Sure I am, the bottom shall never fall out of heaven and happiness to us. I would give over the bargain a thousand times, were it not that Christ's free grace has taken our salvation in hand. Pray, pray and contend with the Lord, for your sister church; for it would appear that the Lord is about to speer for His scattered sheep, in the dark and cloudy day. Oh that it would please our Lord to set up again David's old wasted and fallen tabernacle in Scotland, that we might see the glory of the second temple in this land! And, howbeit He has caused the blossom to fall off my one poor joy, that was on this side of heaven, even my liberty to preach Christ to His people, yet I am dead to that now, so that He would hew and carve glory, glory for evermore, to my royal King out of my silence and sufferings. I entreat you earnestly for the aid of your prayers, for I forget not you; and I salute, with my soul in Christ, the faithful pastors, and honorable and worthy professors in that land. Now the God of peace, that brought again our Lord Jesus from the dead, the great Shepherd of the sheep, by the blood of the everlasting covenant, make you perfect in every good work, to do His will, working in you that which is well-pleasing in His sight. Grace, grace be with you.

ABERDEEN, Feb. 4, 1638

Tuesday, November 01, 2005

Real Quick

My computer's been shutting off unannounced, so that I often lose unsaved stuff as I'm typing, thus making it very difficult to email, post stuff on my blog, and consistently send posts to Calvin's Corner. So, I don't have much time to quickly post here and say "Hey everybody! How's it going?"