Gravity

One of my least favorite activities, but one that my wife seems to frequently have me doing, is hanging ceiling fans. May main problem is gravity. If you're working on the ground and you drop something, it falls a few feet at most. Bend over and pick it up. No big deal. But with hanging a ceiling, when you drop something, you must climb all the way back down the ladder, get the thing you dropped, and climb back up. Since everything we use is made by the Chinese who hate Americans, all the screws and parts are designed to be difficult to assemble, so as to drive us nuts on purpose. Here's what I've come up with. If I could just suspend gravity for about 10-15 minutes, I could get a ceiling fan up fairly easily. So, don't be afraid if things suddenly fly in the air for a short time. It's not the rapture. It's just me trying to put up a ceiling fan.

Back to the Grind

Well, it's back to work again today. After two weeks off following the birth of #6, I'm ready to get back to work for some well-needed rest. It's hard work having a baby every 18 months or so (and I'm saying that as the father!).

I found this quote in Matthew Henry last night (really, from Matthew Henry, HIS commentary on Matthew 20:20-28): "Religion, if it be worth anything, is worth everything." Something for me to think about today at work. Now I'm off to get the coffee fountain flowing!

Sharing some pictures

Momma says knock you out!

Daniel loves his new baby brother, Jesse.

Jesse hates his sissy hat.

New Yogurt Flavor

Yes, I invented a new yogurt flavor. My wife's been making homemade yogurt. Just plop some existing yogurt into some milk to get the culture going, heat it for a few hours, and flavor it however you want. Tonight we had hot wings for supper, and then the kids finished off the lime yogurt. Not wanting the same flavor, I looked around the kitchen and, lo and behold! Buffalo sauce! That's right! Buffalo sauce... one part butter, one part hot pepper sauce. Look for Jerry's Buffalo Yogurt coming to your local grocery store!

Daniel's poem and Matthew Henry's Death

A poem, by Daniel (3 years old).

He kiss my nose.
He bite my nose.
Will he bite my eye?

In other news: Matthew Henry is dead. Yes, he is dead. I do not mean that he does not live forever in the presence of our Lord, no, in that sense, he lives, for the Lord is the Lord of the living. I've seen several times now people quoting Matthew Henry's Commentary on Romans, 1st Corinthians, Ephesians, Colossians, Revelation, etc., and they do so by saying "Matthew Henry wrote...". There's a problem here folks. Matthew Henry died before completing his Commentary on the New Testament (He died after completing the Book of Acts, I believe). The rest of the New Testament Commentary bearing Matthew Henry's name was written by other folks. So, go back and change it, people. Because Matthew Henry did NOT write it. I would like to announce that I will soon be completing Calvin's Commentary on Revelation. When it is finished, you guys can quote it and say "Calvin wrote" or "Calvin says."

Quick Recap

Got a package in the mail today for one "Jessius Augustinius Waybright," which I thought was cool. Yesterday, I dug up a bush. Not the bush pictured below, but the one just to the left of what is pictured.


Spot my cat! He wants to eat your bunny.

There's a discussion of preterism vs historicism going on at the Covenanted Reformation Club. I'd hoped it would have gone better than it actually did. Some very good points were made, but folks were to quick too go right to "heretic! false prophet!" for my liking. Establish your point first. Polemic can be an effective and useful tool in debate, but it doesn't replace good argument. Polemic should be like salt and pepper, and not the whole meal. My position in the debate? Historicism, and the Papacy is that man of sin, the very Antichrist, predicted in Scripture.

Two in a row!

Small victory, I know, but we've just had our 2nd good night of sleep in a row. I feel rested enough now that I may try to stop beating my wife and children and see how that goes. What? Look, it's better than self-harm, and I had to do something to get through! Actually, the lawn looks pretty ratty, and I may have to take a drive today to pick something up for my wife, so don't worry about me having nothing to do while I'm on paternity leave.

A loved one stopped by last night. I'll refrain from identifying her, except for saying that she is a her, ur, her is a she, blah! You know what I mean! I remember a story my friend told me about a childhood incident in which a group of children were staying overnight at a friend's house. The friend's drunk father came home, and started making grilled cheese sandwhiches left and right, like he's feeding an army. He became very adamant that everyone eat the grilled cheese sandwhiches. Stories like that are funny and sad at the same time, ya know? Well, this family member called yesterday, "I want to come over to see the baby." Ok, we're home, come on over. Somehow this 15 minute drive became 4 hours, and she got here blitzed out of her mind, repeating things over and over, repeating things, repeating things, repeating things over and over, over and over, repeating things over and over, calling for children that were standing right in front of her, literally blocking her line of sight, handing out junk she bought at the dollar store, and falling asleep while holding the baby. Cole found much of this quite funny, and it was. But it was sad at the same time. She did bring me two Meerschaum pipes, one new, and one that is 35 years old. Meerschaum is a porous material mined almost exclusively in Turkey, and it makes for a very cool pipe -- it changes colors as you smoke it, from white to a golden brown, and it smokes very dry because the moisture gets absorbed nicely into the porous Meerschaum. So, let's review...

Drunken visit, bad.

Meerschaum pipes, good.

Remember these guys? Good. Hold that thought.

Saturday night into Lord's Day morning was another nearly sleepless night. It was a real struggle to get up in the morning and make a profitable Sabbath. But alas, we did what we could. During our morning worship, the phone rang, or beeped rather (remember when phones used to actually ring? and when "don't touch that dial" actually had literal meaning?) Most of our friends and family know enough to avoid calling us on the Lord's Day, so my wife and I did this thing where we look at each other like "what the ???" and then we both thought "maybe it's an emergency!" So I jumped up and got the phone. It was these guys. Remember them? The gentleman said, "Hi Jerry, remember me from Old Country Buffet? We're thinking of coming over for you worship service." Hold on now! Three problems:

1. A family of 13 shouldn't just be inviting themselves ANYWHERE by saying "hey, we'll be there in a half-hour."

2. We just had a baby, and we're not getting any sleep, we're not quite up for 11 more children just yet.

3. There are people that I am like-minded with, and others who I am just an inch away from being like-minded with, who I am not currently worshipping with for various reasons (which I hope to be rectified soon), so I am NOT going to invite a family over for worship who are likely some stripe of anabaptist, and who though enough about Calvinism to warn me against it! Maybe we can be friends of some sort, or something like that. But terms of friendship and terms of communion are not one and the same!

This has renewed my vigor to rectify those things which have forced me within my own home for worship on Lord's Days for well over a year now. That's enough.

I love the night life...

Our last baby, Elisabeth, started sleeping through the night almost immediately. Daniel, before her, also quickly learned to sleep at night.  So, I suppose we’ve been a bit spoiled. Jesse has not been sleeping well at night at all, but waking up very frequently with seemingly insatiable hunger. Here’s how last night went down.

My wife took the baby to bed to try and get some sleep in early before he starts his sleep depravation torture routine. I stayed up to fold some laundry, to eat a little something, and to just enjoy that ever-so-elusive “alone time."  While I’m folding the laundry, I start to hear some crying… but it wasn’t the crying I expected. It was Elisabeth.  So, I ran up stairs to get Elisabeth so that her crying  would not wake up my poor, wasted, anti-popish, anti-prelatic, exhausted wife. I took Lil’ Beth down stairs and gave her a drink.  As I continue to eat and fold laundry with my older baby in my lap, I hear a loud and stiff THUD, and then screaming. Little Daniel, who sleeps in the attic, fell off the bunk. I quickly sat Elisabeth on the couch, and ran up two flights of stairs (not bad for an out-of-shape old married guy) to find Daniel laying in a pile on the floor, complete with the safety gate that was supposed to prevent such a spill.  As I’m about to pick up Daniel, I hear crying behind me. It was Elisabeth. She followed me up the stairs, crying all the way.  So, I scooped up little Daniel with one hand, and littler Elisabeth in the other, and after a mild infarction, started back down the steps with the two kids I did not expect to be the culprits in tonight’s adventure of “guess who’s crying and why."  As I’m heading down the hallway, I bump into my wife who’s like “Where you going with those kids? Put them back to bed.”  So I did.  Where was I going with the kids? I have no idea, I just freaked.  I was trying to buy my wife some sleep, so shoot me.  Back downstairs to finish laundry and my meatballs.  By the time I came upstairs for bed, Jesse started up, and so up and down with him all night.  Again, in an effort to secure some sleep for my wife, I took Jesse downstairs to try to comfort him, but there is a problem:  Only one thing will comfort him and I am ill-equipped as the Alpha-male that I am to provide it. Sorry honey, I tried.

We’re tired.  I feel sick, nasty, and discombobulated, like I did for 10 years of working nightshift.  Attention evildoers:  Calm down.  I said I feel like I did when I worked nightshift, not that I am again working nightshift.  So don’t come slithering around my house at night you so-and-so!  Don't ask my wife how she feels, cuz you might hear some words you weren't banking on.

Even with all this, having kids is worth it. The work is not wasted, with God’s blessing. It’s other peoples’ kids that I have a real problem with.  I’ll probably end up blogging about our adventure with other peoples’ kids at the playground, but I’m not sufficiently calmed down about it yet.

In other news:  Our good friends donated some raw milk to us yesterday, and as expected, the cream rose to the top by this morning. I’m dumping it in my coffee for some yummy hot morning elixir!

Blessing, and sadness.

Well, in our day of blessing we also have reason to mourn. My wife has gained a son and lost a grandmother on the same day. The Lord gives, the Lord takes away. Blessed be the name of the Lord.


The whole kids.

Jesse Austin Waybright

Friends,

Rejoice with them that do rejoice," (Rom. 12:15).

"Lo, children are an heritage of the LORD: and the fruit of the womb is his reward. As arrows are in the hand of a mighty man; so are children of the youth. Happy is the man that hath his quiver full of them: they shall not be ashamed, but they shall speak with the enemies in the gate" (Psalm 127:3-5).

"Thy wife shall be as a fruitful vine by the sides of thine house: thy children like olive plants round about thy table. Behold, that thus shall the man be blessed that feareth the LORD. The LORD shall bless thee out of Zion: and thou shalt see the good of Jerusalem all the days of thy life. Yea, thou shalt see thy children’s children, and peace upon Israel." (Psalm 128:3-6).

Please rejoice with us in the birth of our newest arrow in the quiver, Jesse Austin Waybright. Weight= 9 lbs, 9 oz. Our heavest baby yet, by an entire pound! 21 1/2 inches long. See the paws on this puppy? I mean this child is HEALTHY.

Why Jesse?
Jesse is the father of the sweet psalmist of Israel, King David. Our Lord Jesus Christ was pleased to reveal Himself to the Old Testament saints as "the root and stem of Jesse"(Isaiah 11:1-11). The name Jesse itself means "gift."

Why Austin?
"Austin saith," is a phrase one may come across in the writings of the great Reformers of the Church, and in some of the eminent theologians of days gone by. It is a reference to St. Aurelius Augustine of Hippo, Northern Africa (AD 354-430). Some of Austin's best known works are his Confessions, City of God, and his treatises On The Predestination of the Saints and On the Gift of Perseverance. He was a great defender of the doctrine of salvation by grace alone in his day, and his writings were read and oft quoted by the likes of Martin Luther and John Calvin in defense of the same at the time of the Reformation. Would that the doctrines of grace would be so faithfully defended in our day.

Why Waybright?
Come on now, don't be dumb.

Tolerance towards other religions

Sometimes one's faith can get shaken a bit. Especially when one holds to such a lonely faith as that of the Reformed Presbyterians, or Covenanters. I am thankful and so very blessed to have access to works like A Cloud of Witnesses, and The Act, Declaration, and Testimony. When I go back and read of the struggles of our spiritual forefathers, I see Christ's stamp on their work and testimony. So, last night I was continuing to re-read the Act Declaration and Testimony, and I came across these wise words, a fit warning for us to heed today...

"Experience has, in every age, taught, that a toleration of all religions is the cut-throat and ruin of all true religion. It is the most effectual method that ever the policy of hell hatched, to banish all true godliness out of the world."

Is this really a legitimate experiment?

The kids revealed that the experiment they've been working on is to see if lightning bugs can breathe underwater. I'm not a scientist, but I'm thinking that that's something one might be able to find in the available literature, or at least deduced from common knowledge. Then again, hey... maybe you'll be reading about my kids' amazing discovery in the latest issue of Firefly Science Monthly Technical Journal.

My family ain't that big

Yesterday's attempt to fish was cut short by the thunderstorm passing through, so we all loaded up and went to Old Country Buffet. In there, as my pregnant wife and I were getting the other five kids situated, we noticed a family of... 1, 2, 3, 4,.... 11 children. We went over and introduced ourselves, and it appears we have much in common. We both (obviously, I guess) believe that it is God that opens and closes the womb, and therefore it is a great sin to be willfully barren. We both homeschool and would never have so many children only to turn them over for antichristian government indoctrination. They have their babies at home like us, though they do not even use a midwife, and we use a midwife. But there were some things in which we disagreed with. Scott, the head of this family, actually warned me against Calvinism, and I did my best to quickly correct his false statements about it. They seem to be charismatic of some stripe or another, and were planning on attending a Landmark Baptist Church service after dinner (but they are not worshipping anywhere regularly at the moment). We exchanged phone numbers, as I know it can be lonely having a big family, as most people just kinda get scared of you! We'll see what happens.

More fishing

Went fishing again. This time we went to Stoever's Dam. We didn't catch anything, but hopefully the people who run the dam can do something about that in the future.

The Friendship of Christ.

Honestly, I never did keep many friends. As a kid, I'd normally have maybe one guy I'd hang out with at a time, but even then it was never the kind of friendship that one thinks of as true friendship. Don't get me wrong, I do have a few people that I consider to be dear friends now, but they are few, and not all of them have websites. I can't say it's a great privilege to be my friend, as I suppose I'm not a very good one. I tend to keep things to myself, or rather, just plain keep to myself. People tend to laugh and seem to have a good time around me, but being a clown comes with some pain, ya know. I do very much appreciate those who have been friendly and kind to me, even in my darkest times. I thank God for those friends.

This past Lord's Day, I was reading in a book called Upon the Types of the Old Testament by Edward Taylor. Edward Taylor was a New England Puritan who has rather recently been discovered to be one of Americas great poets. And while he did hold to several errors of opinion (he was pro-Cromwell and anti-Presbyterian), his book of sermons on the types of the Old Testament (though difficult reading), is helpful in many ways. This is a quote, on the friendship of Christ, is from Taylor's Sermon on Colossians 1:15 --

"Who is the image of the invisible God, the firstborn of every creature."

"Does Christ's excellency shine forth upon us through the emblem of the Firstborn?...

"... the address it lays you under is to use all diligence to attain a sure friendship with Christ. Make Christ your friend. It's worthwhile to attain His friendship. He is God's Firstborn. Strive to be His favorite. You can't come into favor with God without His favor. God will not love you if you do not love His Firstborn. David had Jonathan for his friend unto the king, and Jonathan's friendship was frequently perfuming Saul's ears with sweet words for David. But oh! What is it then to have Jesus Christ your friend who will always be speaking well for you with His Father? He being God's firstborn is heir of all things. You are eternally advanced if He is your friend. If you are in His friendship, He will admit you into all sorts of friendship unto Him, and unto His Father: He will bring you into the friendship of a servant unto his lord, or rather will give you the friendship that a Master gives his faithful servants, Matt. 25:21; of a Brother to his brother, Heb. 2:11, 12; of a Parent to his children, John 21:5; of a Tutor to his scholars, John 8:31; of a Pastor to his flock, John 10:1, 2; of a King unto his people, Luke 12:32; Matt. 26:31; as of a Nurse to the little babe, Isa. 40:11; yea, as of a Co-heir in all His birthrights, Rom. 8:15, 16. Oh! What happiness is infused into the spirit by the influences of that friendship which is between friend and friend, between brethren and brethren, brethren and sisters, parents and children, husband and wife, shepherd and flock, prince and people? etc. But now if Christ is your friend, He will bestow on you the friendship of all relations. He will open the golden sleuces [floodgates] of all sorts of friendship, and let all come upon you in Him, and so He will be all in all to you. Think of it. For in that He is God's Firstborn He is capable of doing this. Therefore strive for His friendship. Fall on all those duties as lead into His friendship -- as repentance, reformation, faith, new obedience, etc."

I took the liberty of updating some of the language. I hope all who read this would strive for the friendship of Jesus Christ.

Sleep

Had trouble sleeping last night. Was tormented with hellish thoughts throughout. Disturbing enough to be nightmarish, but to close to reality to be only dreaming. Ever wake up and go "Whew... I'm glad that was just a dream... oh... wait, that did actually happen"? If not, good.

Gone Fishing

We went fishing today. The family, the whole... kids. I'm not sure why exactly, but there's something profoundly enjoyable about just sitting there, thinking, smoking a pipe, relaxing.... don't fall asleep now... gotta keep an eye on your bobber... even if you don't catch anything (and we didn't). Now, re-rigging each kid's line every 3 seconds is not all that relaxing, but there was still something enjoyable about it. We went to Memorial Lake, at Fort Indiantown Gap. We all felt so "homeland secure" fishing near the Army base, knowing that those low-flying black helicopters, spotted the past few days flying all over Lebanon County, flying just above, and apparently following, the telephone wires, are looking out for us, the American people, so we can enjoy our fishing freedoms, safe from the terrorists that hate our country because we are free to fish.

We also heard a bullfrog, saw a turtle, and encountered the bunny. I did see a guy in a boat catch a fish, proving that the lake did indeed contain fish. He threw it back. Threw it back! I don't care how small it is, I don't care if it's poisonous, or whatever, if we catch it, we eatin' it. I know some people throw them back thinking it's cruel to catch them and keep them. But I figure it's more cruel to rip their lips off with a hook, only to throw them back to have the same thing happen later. You caught it, you got what you came here for, now take it home and eat it. Well, I'd write more, but I need to go fix some bikes. I am a dad, you know.

Plumber no, dumber yes.

If you guys were truly my friends, you wouldn't have allowed me to take apart the sink. No, not after my adventure with the toilet. So, I hold you all accountable for my now unusable sink in the downstairs water-closet. Oh, I did manage to retrieve a pen, a penny, a lollipop stick, a big wad of... something very slimy....eeew. I just can't get it back together again. You see, in plumbing, it's important that things be plumb. I however, am not the plumbest guy you'll ever meet. Dumbest maybe. I don't mean common street dumb, I mean "went to college" dumb. Man, if I had it to do all over again, I'd learn a trade. I'm still considering modeling since I'm so dern handsome, but other than that I'm pretty useless sometimes. Maybe I could go into business with my kids... they made some money selling beaded necklaces and Cool Aid. Ahh.... that wouldn't help me learn to plumb, though. (sigh)