Gay Marriage is A-OK with me!

Let me go on record that I am for gay marriage. I mean, if you are going to get married, it might as well be a gay marriage. Why be in a doleful or despondent marriage? Jesus was at a gay wedding - keep the wine coming, we’re having fun now! Nothing wrong with gay, people.

As for homosexual marriages, let’s not be absurd. There is no such thing as homosexual marriage. It’s an oxymoron, like a married bachelor, or cruel kindness. Look, marriage existed and was defined long before the United States of America came along, and it is not our right or duty to alter the historic and universal meaning of marriage by redefining in it a way to reflect our own sinful perversion. God instituted marriage. God has defined it, and marriage is man and woman becoming one flesh, NOT people of the same sex doing that which is against nature. “Homosexual marriage" is therefore meaningless. As far as I’m concerned, we should cease our attempts to make all manner of uncleanness to fall under the sanction of the undefiled marriage bed.

No matter what the courts decide to call it, no matter what amendment may be added to the U.S. Constitition, homosexual acts can never be properly called marriage.